Marriage is encouraged in Islam, Allah and His Messenger (SAW) helped us discover what things make a successful marriage. Everyone should try to keep their marriage a happy marriage. Happy marriage gives peace and acts as a guide for children.
Tips for Happy Marriage:
Some basic points to keep a marriage happy are:
- Short separations including hours and minutes will strengthen the marriage but long separations can be dangerous.
- The fitrah is the natural disposition of a person, e.g. Allah has created man and women with certain qualities that are innate in them. Both the husband and wife must try not to challenge each others’ fitrah but to adjust to and accommodate the partner’s God-given nature.
- Solve disputes on the same day. Prophet Muhammad (SAW) said,
“Don’t let disputes stay until the next day but solve them the same day.”
- Shaytan is always there to cause fitna for people, especially between the husband and wife so it’s important not to let disputes last longer than a day otherwise small issues will seem very big.
- Don’t speak about your past.
- Don’t expect perfection. In a Hadees,
A couple came to Prophet (saw) and said ‘we make mistakes’ and He (SAW) said
‘you are not perfect’.
- Always evaluate problems honestly and don’t expect miracles.
- Convey your love and warm feelings to each other. Holy Prophet said,
“You must express yourself to your partners”.
- The wife of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) said,
“The Prophet (SAW) never let a day pass without showing his affection.”
- Fight against your own problems and don’t share anger with your partner.
- Do not be critical of each other.
- All type of criticism is forbidden in Islam.
- Islam allows certain types of lying in order to maintain a good relationship e.g. complementing the wife’s cooking even if it doesn’t taste nice.
- When disputing with your partner don’t expand the argument by adding all other previous disputes. Prophet (SAW) said,
“Dare any of you who sleep with his wife in the night and then critises her in the morning.”
- Never doubt your partner. Doubting each other can lead to the destruction of the marriage.