Ramadan, the season of blessings, is fast approaching its end. But don’t be sad as we still have a few more blessed days and a few more blessed nights, including the most blessed of them all, to collect the rewards, please Allah (SWT), and secure a place in Paradise. If you are worried that how to deal with kids while fasting and show real patience to them; then this article is for you.
Being Patient. How?
One way to please Allah (SWT) this Ramadan is to mend our relationship with our children. How? By being more patient and more tolerant and more considerate. By smiling at them. By hugging them. By giving them our time and attention. By listening to their stories and complaints. By loving them.
But why should we take the trouble of undertaking all that? Do they respect us or appreciate what we do for them day in and day out? Don’t they call us archaic and old-fashioned? Don’t they give us a shut-up call every now and then? real patience
They probably do, but should we just leave things where they are and do nothing about them? As parents we must understand that our children are our responsibility and a part of our duty towards them is to be patient with them.
Where should we begin, then?
Communication is the key. Most of us underestimate the value of communication as the first step towards resolution. That’s where we should start. Talking to children frequently can help us understand what their needs are and how they feel about our attitude towards them. It should not make us feel inferior in any way. If the intention is right, the outcome is right. So with a sincere heart we should talk to our kids and let them know we care about them and we wish them well. Talking helps. It does.
There are things kids don’t like about us, for instance, and we can fix them if we want. For example, some kids might feel annoyed when we tell them to do a thing several times in quick succession. That may be a valid observation as many parents do that. It is likely that the repetition of a command several times a day hinders compliance. We must be willing to give our kids enough time to respond positively.
The right time to talk
In other words, we have to show real patience with our kids. Punishment is not the wisest of options. Research tells us it only shoos them away and gives them stress and ruins their emotional development. We should consider deferring our response to their discourteous behavior and wait for the right time to bring it up, when kids are in their good normal state. Harshly reacting to their rudeness right away will only make it worse. We may ignore it at the time and wait for a better opportunity.
One of the greatest virtues Ramadan teaches us is the virtue of patience. While everyone needs loads of patience to excel in life, parents can’t do without it. That is one essential part of being a parent. It helps us connect with our children. It helps us understand them better. And what better occasion than Ramadan to show real patience being parent.